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seams unstitched

You begin to stir, coming slowly out of your post-Sleep-of-the-Dead stupor, but you refuse to open your eyes just yet. The waking up to a state of actual coherency takes even longer than usual tonight, which you suppose makes sense, given activities you'd been up to, prior to falling asleep for jegus knows how long.
You've had some trouble inhabiting the Veil with the humans and their weird-ass sleep schedules and the limited hours of overlap. It's completely ludicrous, you think. Why don't they just sync up to you and the other trolls? It's not like there's a fucking sun or two to fuck with them and make it difficult, the place is completely and pervasively black and cold and metal except where you've rigged lanterns of some sort so you can fucking see shit. You all were here first, they're the interlopers that decided to move in and team up or whatever their grubsmacking maggotinfested pathetic excuses for think pans came up with. You

i like my sugar with two teaspoons of coffee! 3Your name is John Egbert, and you are a genius.
"Shh, Rose, c'mon! Just trust me," you hiss at her, giggling with manic glee, as you drag her out of the small restaurant and onto the sidewalk. It's overcast and grossly humid; you can feel your shirt getting heavy with moisture already, but you couldn't care less! You are far too pleased with your superior matchmaking ability to be bothered by silly things like dumb, gross weather.
"What are they doing...?" You mutter, not really talking to anyone in particular, as you shuffle around in an awkward dance-wiggle combo as you press your nose up aginst the glass in an attempt to peer back through the window, into the building. You think you can see the vague shapes of two people where your table was -- you can't really tell that far into the restaurant -- but if you had to make a guess you'd say they look like they're having fun! Oh man, you are so great. Good friend, best matchmaker.
"John, stop this nonsense immediately, you

i like my sugar with two teaspoons of coffee! 2You are fucked.
You are completely an utterly fucked in the worst way imaginable.
You are fucked and there is no help for you, not any, you are alone up the creek in a stupid floaty raft because you were too cheap to get a real boat and there is a giant fucking tear in your useless floating raft, and all the air is hissing out, and the air is laughing at you, in jaunty-as-fuck little hisses of malicious glee, because you are fucked and even the fucking air fucking knows how fucked you are.
You are royally flipping your shit and imaginary air is laugh-hissing at you in your mind because you are flipping your shit that fucking hard.
You are pretty sure you have a date.
You are equally sure that you do not know how to deal with a date, and you are way more sure that you are not asking your brother for help, desperately as you need it, regardless of your brother being completely homosexual and in possession of a boyfriend. The dude's a dick. And you ar

i like my sugar with two teaspoons of coffee!You are about to punch a hole in your stupid fucking front door.
There is a reason for your frustration, it's not as out of left fucking field or the deepest recesses of outer space like you know your anger sometimes (~~almostconstantly~~) can be. You are actually somewhat justified this time, honest. Your dickwad porngenerator fuckwit of a brother, after ensuring repeatedly that he would get the lock replaced, after you tried many times to slather the fucking thing in WD-40, after he damn near took the thing apart and spread it across the living room floor before carefully piecing it back together -- after the two of you had tried everything you could think of, you finally got him to swear up and down by his fucking perverted puppet website that he would bite the metaphorical wound-gouging bullet and buy a new fucking lock. One that actually worked.
It's been a week since then, and you have worked every day of that significantly lengthy week, sometimes coming in to

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Submitted: January 11
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dave that's holly you dumb buttby ~affectionateTea

Fan Art / Cartoons & Comics / Digital / Other

Jade is a botanist, ofc she knows, she's just messing with him.
John has no clue and doesn't mind some smooching between bros,
but when Dave goes to smooch Rose on the cheek, she enlightens him.
He's too afraid of Jade for proper revenge, so he enlists John to help him, but John just
ends up turning on Dave and pranking him instead (for he is also terrified of Jade).

Dave hides in his room for a few hours moping dramatically until Jade comes to
smack some sense into him.
Also also kiss him properly as an apology.
Dave is appeased.<3

≠≠≠
round 01 for secretsantahomestuck
also on tumblr: [link]
dave and jade © AHuss